Redistribute. It's the (new) American Way.

I found Obama's performance tonight to be flawless. He spoke just like George Soros taught him. I'll give it to him. He is about the most eloquent spokesman for communism I've ever heard. What a pity the Cold War ended already. He'd have been a shoe-in for information minister under Andropov or Khrushchev.

When did it become a crime to make it? When did it become the government's responsibility to make sure your children were taken care of? I guess I missed the memo. Here I am, trying to ensure a better life for my son, and all the time, I could have been depending on Barney Frank to take better care of him than I ever could have dreamed.

Incidentally, I found it interesting that "health care is a right...in a country as wealthy as ours...". I guess that, once again, I was operating on the outdated notion that "rights" were those things that were assumed as part of a universal belief about people's place in the universe. Apparently, health care is a right in America, but not in the Congo. Not in the Sudan. Not in any less "fortunate" country. It's good to know.

I move that we also amend our Declaration of Independence to specify that only Americans are endowed by their Creator with inalienable rights to Life, Libery, and Property. After all, we are the only ones who can afford such luxuries...right, Senator Obama? I guess the rest of the world can just suffer until your far-sighted generosity touches them. After all, YOU (and your party) are the true guarantors of all real "rights". Until the colossal thieves Barney Frank, Nancy Pelosi, Barack ("the One") Obama, and the Obama Youth are on board, all such claims to these heretofore "rights" are simply rhetoric.

Please, Senator Obama. Please let us poor sheep know which rights we can afford under your New Plan for America. Far be it from me to be so presumptuous as to claim rights to which I am untitled due to my poor position in life. We await Thy Glorious pronouncement.