I just had to copy this from Frank J. over at IMAO. Hilarious as usual. Also not a terrible idea.
“There’s talk that General Petraeus may change the rules of engagement in Afghanistan. We here at IMAO have obtained an advanced copy of what those new rules may be:
LETHAL FORCE CAN BE APPLIED WHEN…
* Someone is shooting at you.
* Someone is shooting near you.
* Someone is shooting another Transformers sequel.
* Someone blows into a vuvuzela.
* You already tried fisticuffs, and that didn’t work.
* You have written permission from your parents.
* Someone makes a “Yo’ Mama” joke that really stings.
* You ask, “Can I use lethal force against you?” and you’re pretty sure you see the guy nod.
* You’ve run into the inventor of clamshell packaging.
* Someone just looks extra, super terroristy.
* Someone throws a puppy at you.
* You’re absolutely sure there’s no media around.”